Buddy
It was late Fall, back in 2020. I was watching the last few leaves floating to the ground. I thought about the living, and how we all seep into the painless winds of time.
I found it strange that Buddy was lying on our sofa, as I walked into the living room that morning. His head was hanging loosely from the cushion. “Oh, well,” I thought. “it that’s comfortable for him, I’m not going to bother him.”
Making toast, I turned to find him standing beside me. He had a strangely tired look in his beautiful brown eyes. I let him out for his morning trip to the yard.
That evening, I was sitting in my recliner. Buddy walked up and stood before me. He stared, as if he had a voiceless question. Within the minute, and without hesitation, he placed his right paw on my thigh. Slowly, ever so slowly, he did the same with his left. Then, his right rear leg, and finally the last. He finished it off by curling up on my lap—all 80-pounds of dog.
He had never before wanted to be this close. He moved in with my wife and I, along with our oldest daughter. He grew, ever so hesitantly, to accept and love our other Golden female, Reilley. She was four years old and he was seven.
On my lap, he remained perfectly still, other than laying his head against my shoulder. I listened to his breathing and tried to match it with mine till I couldn’t keep up.
In early December, Christmas trees begin to appear everywhere. Our house was no different. On the 11th, I arrived in the early morning hours to find Buddy curled up behind our tree, and against the wall behind it. I whispered, “Buddy.” No response. I came up behind him, “Buddy. Hi, Buddy.” Still nothing. I placed my hands on his hips and slowly pulled him out to see what was wring. He looked up at me with glazed-over eyes. I encouraged him to his feet and helped him to the back door. He stood for a few seconds, then stepped down the two steps off the deck.
When my wife got up, I told her there was something wrong. We figured it would be a good idea to take him to the vet as soon as possible. Luckily, she had an opening that afternoon.
Buddy could always hop up into the back seat of the car, but today he placed his two front legs on the seat and waited for me to pick up his rear.
At the vet’s office, she determined that Buddy had a large tumor in his belly and that he was in a lot of pain. The decision was made to send Buddy to heaven, where his pain would cease. My wife stayed with him as he fell asleep.
How little I knew that, as I lifted him into the car, I would never see him again. No, he wasn’t my dog, but he’d taken his time to touch my heart. I understood how he had been saying his ‘goodbye’ that night, as he curled up on my lap. Life can be hell without an amazing dog to help you make it. They know how to suffer in silence. I never knew I’d still miss him this much after these long 18-months. I now understand the reason he curled up on my lap. It was to leave a beautiful memory with warm tears racing down my cheeks. See you again, Buddy.
Casino Danova – 31 May 2022